creepy

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i know that i just posted on bedbugs last week, and this doesn’t necessarily mean a weekly bedbug update, but this article in the new york times is a really interesting read on how scientifically elusive bedbugs have been since their resurgence in the 90s. entomologists can only speculate as to what facilitated their rapid spread, where in the world they came from, and, most importantly, how the heck we can get rid of them. even more puzzling (and equally refreshing) is that they don’t carry or transmit diseases, making them just as clean as a baby’s armpit, only filled with human blood.

that said, i’m not sure if i totally buy their clean bill of health. you know how we look back on the dark ages and we’re like, ‘how could they not have known it was the fleas that carried the plague??” i feel like posterity is going to look back on us in these dark ages and be like ‘how could they not have known that bed bugs were carrying bieber fever??’ you never know, but you can speculate.

one of the most surprising things i learned in this article is what great senses of humor entomologist have. what a hoot!

now please get back to work and find us a cure. PLEASE!

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the snuggie-macarena partnership you knew was coming is finally here. only it provides a glimpse into our culture that is far more depressing than any episode of jersey shore could ever be.

i think even los del rio are having second thoughts about having their song associated with this mess.

thanks, dan!

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ugh, so sorry! i’ve just been posting about bugs and blood and other natural resources being sucked dry without any regard for how it would make your tuesday go. so here’s a video of a filipino guy making creepy faces at you to make you feel better about being a human on planet earth today.

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SPOILER ALERT:

We’re screwed!

America (nay, the world) has got bedbug problems that have been increasing exponentially ever since we made the mistake of outlawing DDT in the 50s, the only toxin proven to kill bed bugs DEAD. if you’re unlucky enough to live in the midwest, you’re unlucky for many reasons, but chief amongst them is your increased risk for bed bugs. sorry, cincinnatti!

but don’t come fleeing to my town, with your carpetbag o’ bitin’ bedbugs. stay right where you are and for god’s sake don’t go traveling or giving away your furniture!

read the dailybeast’s top ten list, which may as well be renamed “cities that should just be abandoned and left for dead until we have harnessed our supposedly advanced technology to exterminate a simple blood-sucking parasite.’ i mean, can’t we get google or apple on this crisis???

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two german ladies try to bring their dead husband/father on board on a plane to Berlin by sticking him in a wheelchair and putting sunglasses on him. They then act surprised when he doesn’t wake up to actually walk through security.

“They would think that for 24 hours we would carry a dead person? This is ridiculous. He was moving, he was breathing. Eight people saw him…A dead person you cannot carry to Germany, there are too many people checking and security. How can you bring a dead person to Germany?”

read the full story here.

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this was filmed in the bizarro parallel world where i killed myself at age 5:

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: japan, you are so fucked up sometimes.

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little lady gaga

in brazil, this 8-year-old kid actually exists. what’s scarier is the existence of her parents who encourage her to wear black lipstick and dance and sing poorly to lady gaga’s songs about debilitating obsessions. at one point, the parents must have even suggested that the kid crawl sexily around on the floor. very classy.

at the same time, i love a world where this kid exists, so long as she remains in another hemisphere.

via thedailywhat

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these inmates say they’re not telling how they “tattooed” their eyeballs, but it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that some friend or family member has been smuggling in PAAS easter egg dyeing kits during visiting hours.

or i wonder if the guy with red eyes was like, ‘man, if i eat one more of these rats, i’m going to plumb turn into a rat, amirite??!’ and then one morning, poof.

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will someone other than thousands of russian spammers please leave a comment on this blog??? i don’t even get why they leave it on just one post and why they’re all for pharmaceuticals, but russia is really pissing me off. and what’s with the cryptic comments: i’d like a single to paris, please?? i don’t like the colour?? are they plucking these comments from an audrey hepburn film or what??

comments

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um…

some of my fans teach me that i may not be as progressive as i thought:

chat

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and why if i ever do i’ll check to see if the instructor is a registered sex offender.

via everythingisterrible

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after clicking through a few pages of this website, i immediately had to clear out my cache and history so that i and my computer could forget about ever finding this site. and clicking through it. to multiple pages.

it’s a body part rating website wherein people submit photos of certain body parts (eyes, legs, elbows, over-18 parts) and then other “bodies” rate their anatomy with 1 to 5 stars and make some lecherous comment about it. below is the “most disturbing eyeball” contest:

bodypart

this guy actually wanted people to rate his back. luckily he only got 2 out of 5 stars which will hopefully teach him a lesson about not posting photos of his acneic back/ass and its flying knight tattoo on the internet, and then asking people what they think about it.

back

creep yourself out at the bodypart project

via thedailywhat

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